With this Ring...

In big ways and small, Celebrants embrace the chance to personalize weddings. In “typical” weddings, the ring exchange is generally viewed as a minor coda to the verbal vows. Not so with a Celebrant! First, the ring exchange sets the stage to talk about the symbolism of the object—the ring’s precious metal represents the strength and rarity of true love. Its round shape connotes the infinite nature of love, without a beginning and an end. Moreover, since the ancient Egyptians, the belief is that the vein in the ring finger of the left hand is most directly connected to the heart, hence, its selection as the finger for the placement of the wedding band.

Rings say to the world, “I love,” and “I am loved.” Often, there is special meaning attached to the design or stones in a wedding setting. Lucky brides may have stones or rings that have belonged to cherish a loved one. Or, perhaps, a ring has been individually designed to represent some aspect of the couple’s personality or romantic story. An Irish couple, for example, may choose the traditional Claddagh ring to proclaim their Celtic heritage. And colored stones, now commonplace in engagement rings and wedding bands, have special meanings attached. Last summer, the ring of one of my brides held precious sapphires belonging to the groom’s mother. This gemstone is historically seen as an emblem of heaven, virtue, truth, constancy, and contemplation. The Ruby, another popular wedding gemstone, is associated with nobility, love, contentment, enthusiasm and strength. Rubies are thought to open the heart and promote love and joy in those who wear it.

Noting the specific characteristics of the ring can be complemented by inviting the guests to "bless the rings." In small weddings, the rings may be passed person-to-person before the wedding. Each family member or friend is asked to make a special wish on behalf of the couple’s future happiness.

Remarks about the sentiment and design of rings can be a subtle, artistic thread woven into a personalized ceremony, hardly an afterthought of the exchange of vows.

Memories to Last a Lifetime

After spending much time and great care in planning a wedding, couples want to remember their special day in vivid detail. Indeed, many brides and grooms consider the selection of a photographer and videographer, the traditional chroniclers of the day, to be among the most important decisions in organizing a wedding. I have recently come upon another idea that will provide rich recollections of the wedding day....a "Memory Box."

Celebrants enjoy finding creative opportunities to draw guests into a celebration, as well as fashioning ways to remind our clients of their special occasions, and the Memory Box does just that. The tradition goes something like this: a beautifully crafted box, perhaps a family heirloom, can become one focal point of the ceremony by designating it to serve as something of a time capsule. Guests are encouraged to bring special letters and good wishes for the couple, that can be placed in this sweet archive. Likewise, I encourage brides and grooms to write letters to the other and to consider adding a fine bottle of wine and mementos of the wedding day, to be re-discovered on the first anniversary. What could be better, as part of a one-year anniversary celebration than to read the blessings of loved ones at the time of the wedding. Likewise, for the bride and groom to read the wedding day hopes, wishes, and gratitude of their beloved would be the best anniversary I can think of!